ABNORMAL TIMES CHANGE NORMAL PEOPLE
Hamid and I grew up together in the same locality. We went to different schools but played the games together in the only space called Municipal Park in our Mohalla after school. Many a times we fought over various issues but came back to the playing area without either of us inviting or surrendering. In effect we lived a normal life as all normal people do.
Our families were not close but were familiar and would wish each other. We got our clothes stitched form Hasid’s father who owned a tailoring shop and they would buy clothes from store owned by my father.
Our locality is inhabited by lower middle class families. People have been living here for years in perfect harmony and no incident of violence was ever reported. In fact our locality was quoted as a living example of communal harmony. The families of both the communities were historically segregated on communal lines and no one from one community even tried to own a house on either side of the community divide represented by a narrow street. Herds have to live together for protection and survival.
Everything however, changed after 26/11/2008. There were some under current after the demolition of Babri Masjid on 6/12 to be precise but no weight was ever given to rumors. Now there were rumors that policemen in plain clothes were moving in the area and were in the lookout for some suspects who helped in the logistic support to the terrorists on and before 26/11. The whole atmosphere smacked of conspiracy and distrust of the other community.
People started behaving abnormally. There were no more wishing to other community member, avoiding became the norm. People no more talked but whispered. Business deals too became community centric. My school uniform was sent for stitching to some another tailor in the town. There were clear instructions to us not to play with children of the other side of the street. Women did not move as freely, particularly after sunset.
I still went to the Municipal Park but stayed away from Hamid and children of his community. Hamid was no more a playmate. If it is happening in our Mohalla, could this be happening in Malegaon also? Was it possible that some Mahesh there was no more a playmate of some Hamid there too?
I just wonder how abnormal times change normal people. History is full of stories when normal people behaved quite abnormally. The memories of Partition of India in 1947 are still fresh in the minds of people who were directly involved. Stories are told of the great Bengal famine of 1943 when humans became inhuman in the face of hunger. Abnormal times turn friends into foes. Abnormal times make charity, dignity, compassion a rare virtue.
On the positive side there are stories of normal people remaining normal in the worst of times- helping their fellow beings, sharing food and shelter, protecting against mob furry.
The worse side of human nature, alas, comes in the open in abnormal times.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
FLIRTING AND SEXUAL HARASSMENT
FLIRTING AND SEXUAL HARASSMENT
Some of the signs of flirting and sexual harassment are common like telling off color jokes, touching, commenting on physical attributes or dress, saying like looking beautiful, looking smart and granting favors.
How come that in some cases they are seen as flirting and in other cases as sexual harassment? I think it has more to do with the person involved. Rich, powerful and influential people more often than not show such signs and get away with a simple and fashionable tag of flirt. Just watch the fashion shows or beauty contests and you will quickly be on the same wave length with me.
Forget them too. She how the big boss in office gets away showing all these signs but the poor colleague gets hauled up for sexual harassment. Most of us have worked with female colleagues in office or work place and have experienced the ‘coyness’ of some females while being flirted by bosses and the ‘off limit’ attitudes for others.
Empowered women now are in a position to report sexual harassment cases. The trend had started even when we were in office. Not that all reported cases were true but precaution was better than cure. It was not prudent to call any female employee in your chamber while you are alone. Keeping the doors was a must. Wooden cabins gave way to glass panels and open halls. All this has become a norm now.
Do you think flirting/sexual harassment has increased or that it was always there but rarely reported in a male dominated world for fear of reprisal?
Sexual harassment has been defined widely and differ from country to country but in my opinion flirting is yet to be defined so that one could distinguish between the two.
Some of the signs of flirting and sexual harassment are common like telling off color jokes, touching, commenting on physical attributes or dress, saying like looking beautiful, looking smart and granting favors.
How come that in some cases they are seen as flirting and in other cases as sexual harassment? I think it has more to do with the person involved. Rich, powerful and influential people more often than not show such signs and get away with a simple and fashionable tag of flirt. Just watch the fashion shows or beauty contests and you will quickly be on the same wave length with me.
Forget them too. She how the big boss in office gets away showing all these signs but the poor colleague gets hauled up for sexual harassment. Most of us have worked with female colleagues in office or work place and have experienced the ‘coyness’ of some females while being flirted by bosses and the ‘off limit’ attitudes for others.
Empowered women now are in a position to report sexual harassment cases. The trend had started even when we were in office. Not that all reported cases were true but precaution was better than cure. It was not prudent to call any female employee in your chamber while you are alone. Keeping the doors was a must. Wooden cabins gave way to glass panels and open halls. All this has become a norm now.
Do you think flirting/sexual harassment has increased or that it was always there but rarely reported in a male dominated world for fear of reprisal?
Sexual harassment has been defined widely and differ from country to country but in my opinion flirting is yet to be defined so that one could distinguish between the two.
I AM A HYPOCRITE
I AM A HYPOCRITE
1. I talk of corruption but I know it started from the very house I live in. I did not report the builder who made me pay a substantial portion of the cost in cash. Though I had no black money but I helped him creating it.
2. I talk of ethics but scum to temptations when it comes to saving VAT or service tax while buying goods and services if the I AM A HYPOCRITE
3. I talk of nation building but use all tactics to save Income and Wealth tax and name it clever tax planning by taking advantage of the loopholes in law.
4. I talk of equal justice but appoint the best lawyer to defend myself against a crime committed by me knowingly or unknowingly.
5. I talk of castles, classless, colorless and creedless society but shy away having my meal with the lower cast man I know.
6. I talk of presence of God in all humans but do not allow some to enter my house. I talk of His presence everywhere but look for him in temples.
7. I talk of women empowerment and women emancipation but pray for a male child.
8. I pretend to respect women but see them as a sex object all the time.
9. I pretend to do daily puja but am unable to focus my mind and still continue doing because I have been doing it for all these years.
10. I talk of hating sycophancy and avail all opportunities of maskafying (buttering) for my benefit or earning a few brownie points.
.I am submitting this blog and hoping people appreciate my candid admission and come forward to own at least a few if not all or better still give more such examples of hypocrisy.
1. I talk of corruption but I know it started from the very house I live in. I did not report the builder who made me pay a substantial portion of the cost in cash. Though I had no black money but I helped him creating it.
2. I talk of ethics but scum to temptations when it comes to saving VAT or service tax while buying goods and services if the I AM A HYPOCRITE
1. I talk of corruption but I know it started from the very house I live in. I did not report the builder who made me pay a substantial portion of the cost in cash. Though I had no black money but I helped him creating it.
2. I talk of ethics but succumb to temptations when it comes to saving VAT or service tax while buying goods and services if the provider tells me that not insisting for a receipt will amount to substantial savings in taxes to me as no tax will be charged.
3. I talk of nation building but use all tactics to save Income and Wealth tax and name it clever tax planning by taking advantage of the loopholes in law.
4. I talk of equal justice but appoint the best lawyer to defend myself against a crime committed by me knowingly or unknowingly.
5. I talk of castles, classless, colorless and creedless society but shyaway having my meal with the lower cast man I know.
6. I talk of presence of God in all humans but do not allow some to enter my house. I talk of His presence everywhere but look for him in temples.
7. I talk of women empowerment and women emancipation but pray for a male child.
8. I pretend to respect women but see them as a sex object all the time.
9. I pretend to do daily puja but am unable to focus my mind and still continue doing because I have been doing it for all these years.
10. I talk of hating sycophancy and avail all opportunities of maskafying (buttering) for my benefit or earning a few brownie points.
I am submitting this blog and hoping people appreciate my candid admission and come forward to own at least a few if not all or better still give more such examples of hypocrisy.provider tells me that not insisting for a receipt will amount to substantial savings in taxes to me as no tax will be charged.3. I talk of nation building but use all tactics to save Income and Wealth tax and name it clever tax planning by taking advantage of the loopholes in law.
4. I talk of equal justice but appoint the best lawyer to defend myself against a crime committed by me knowingly or unknowingly.
5. I talk of castles, classless, colorless and creedless society but shy away having my meal with the lower cast man I know.
6. I talk of presence of God in all humans but do not allow some to enter my house. I talk of His presence everywhere but look for him in temples.
7. I talk of women empowerment and women emancipation but pray for a male child.
8. I pretend to respect women but see them as a sex object all the time.
9. I pretend to do daily puja but am unable to focus my mind and still continue doing because I have been doing it for all these years.
10. I talk of hating sycophancy and avail all opportunities of maskafying (buttering) for my benefit or earning a few brownie points.
.I am submitting this blog and hoping people appreciate my candid admission and come forward to own at least a few if not all or better still give more such examples of hypocrisy.
SPOILT BY SPELLCHECK
IAM BEING SPOILT BY SPELLCHECK
Believe it or not, the facility of spell-check on computers is spoiling me. Earlier whenever I had a doubt I would check the dictionary and correct it. It would register for a long time or may be forever. Now I do not have to remember spelling of new words. In fact I have started forgetting the spellings I had learnt and practiced over the years.
Same is problems with figures (I am not talking about 36x24x36). I am talking about arithmetical figures and their application like additions, subtractions, divisions, multiplications, the easiest ones. I do not remember when was the last time I did these functions manually. The handy calculator does it for me.
Am I on the brink of dementia?
Believe it or not, the facility of spell-check on computers is spoiling me. Earlier whenever I had a doubt I would check the dictionary and correct it. It would register for a long time or may be forever. Now I do not have to remember spelling of new words. In fact I have started forgetting the spellings I had learnt and practiced over the years.
Same is problems with figures (I am not talking about 36x24x36). I am talking about arithmetical figures and their application like additions, subtractions, divisions, multiplications, the easiest ones. I do not remember when was the last time I did these functions manually. The handy calculator does it for me.
Am I on the brink of dementia?
LIVING IS NOT EXISTING
LIVING IS NOT EXISTING
Every day, we wake up in the morning; go about our work in the mundane pursuit of living. In the evening we watch those silly serials or reality shows on news or entertainment channels and go to bed only to wake up in the morning to repeat what we did yesterday. Today turns into yesterday and tomorrow turns into today. Our daily fight for living does not change. This is the condition of a vast majority of 1.2 billion strong population of India and 7 billion population of the world. They live but do not exist because nobody really knows about their existence. They are nameless -faceless creatures on this planet earth.
What then, makes a person visible, existing? You may be a very important person for your near and dear but for the community, you do not exist. People are so busy in their daily fight for survival that other than themselves no body exists. The worst part is the fight for survival is against the members of the very community that does not know even you exist. Imagine the games we play to enrich ourselves at the cost of fellow citizens, the untruths we talk about them, the malice we have for them and the total disregard we have for their existence.
A closer look will reveal that even for our family we do not exist if we are not useful. As we grow older the next generation takes charge of the family and makes decisions. There comes a time when we are more contribute in the decision making process of the family. Living but not existing.
The trick therefore is to stop fighting, stop undue expectations, stop unsolicited advice and become useful and keep contributing as long as one can to stay in existence. The contribution may be as small as helping in the home work of the children in the family, fetching them from school, helping in tit- bit shopping like vegetables etc. The idea is to keep you wanted. On a broader level we have to keep ourselves useful for the community in our own way. The contribution again may be very small like reading books to old in the old age homes, helping the neighborhood poor kids in their studies, helping in the activities of the resident welfare associations etc. The idea again is to keep you wanted.
We exist as long as we are useful to the family and the community.
The important thing is to decide for ourselves if we want to live and exist. No one can decide this for us. Left to others, they would rather wish we do not even live. There will be many such cases of living and existing people around us. Let us share their stories. Who knows it may motivate some of us who are simply living but not existing.
Every day, we wake up in the morning; go about our work in the mundane pursuit of living. In the evening we watch those silly serials or reality shows on news or entertainment channels and go to bed only to wake up in the morning to repeat what we did yesterday. Today turns into yesterday and tomorrow turns into today. Our daily fight for living does not change. This is the condition of a vast majority of 1.2 billion strong population of India and 7 billion population of the world. They live but do not exist because nobody really knows about their existence. They are nameless -faceless creatures on this planet earth.
What then, makes a person visible, existing? You may be a very important person for your near and dear but for the community, you do not exist. People are so busy in their daily fight for survival that other than themselves no body exists. The worst part is the fight for survival is against the members of the very community that does not know even you exist. Imagine the games we play to enrich ourselves at the cost of fellow citizens, the untruths we talk about them, the malice we have for them and the total disregard we have for their existence.
A closer look will reveal that even for our family we do not exist if we are not useful. As we grow older the next generation takes charge of the family and makes decisions. There comes a time when we are more contribute in the decision making process of the family. Living but not existing.
The trick therefore is to stop fighting, stop undue expectations, stop unsolicited advice and become useful and keep contributing as long as one can to stay in existence. The contribution may be as small as helping in the home work of the children in the family, fetching them from school, helping in tit- bit shopping like vegetables etc. The idea is to keep you wanted. On a broader level we have to keep ourselves useful for the community in our own way. The contribution again may be very small like reading books to old in the old age homes, helping the neighborhood poor kids in their studies, helping in the activities of the resident welfare associations etc. The idea again is to keep you wanted.
We exist as long as we are useful to the family and the community.
The important thing is to decide for ourselves if we want to live and exist. No one can decide this for us. Left to others, they would rather wish we do not even live. There will be many such cases of living and existing people around us. Let us share their stories. Who knows it may motivate some of us who are simply living but not existing.
MY FRIEND 'DEEP' PART 2.
MY FRIEND, DEEP (2)
Some 15 later, I returned to the town where Deep and I were in College. My niece was getting married. During the course of our talk, she mentioned that Ravi, who claimed to be knowing me as college mate, wanted to meet me. Ir so happened that Ravi owned a popular Saree Shop and they had gone there to buy wedding sarees. They fell short of some money and Ravi suggested that they could pay some other day, as convenient and asked them to give them their name and address for his record. Seeing the common surname, he asked if they were anyway related to me. When they said yes and that I was expected for the wedding, he requested them to ask me to contact them. I could recollect that Ravi was my classmate.
As I had not busy and there was nothing better to do, I went to Ravi’s Saree Shop. We could easily place each other. During the course of our chit chat he informed me that Deep was also in Town, a practicing Chartered Accountant and successful at that. He was Ravi’s tax consultant too. It was something like a bolt from the blue and I requested him to contact him on phone then and there itself.
Ravi dialed Deep’s number and he was on the other side. Ravi briefly informed him about me and handed over the receiver to me. “Arre wahan baitha baitha kya kar raha hai. Jaldi aa aur apane jooton se mere pitai kar”( Oye, what are you doing there. Come immediately and beat me with your shoes). That was Deep for sure. I promised to meet him in the evening at 7.30 and have dinner with him. I said goodbye to Ravi and handed over an Invitation Card to attend the wedding.
I was at his given address exactly at 7.30 in the evening. It was quite a big three storied house. He was at the gate the moment I rang the bell. He had come home early for me, as he said. He asked me what I would like to have for drinks and dinner and I said whatever. We moved to his study. He informed that his wife had gone to meet his kids who were in a boarding school at a nearby hill station and would be returning only after a week or so.
We exchanged the essentials of our lives and family and for rest of time he talked and I listened In his own words;
“After completing my CA I tried to settle in my practice at various places but finally landed in this town. I sold my share of the agricultural land in the villages. I wanted to do differently as my experience so far had been bad, at the best. With my wife I took a room in a pricy Hotel. I moved around the town and observed that most of the cars were Ambassador. I thought who would spot me in an Ambassador. I purchased a second hand Fiat and moved around the town with the single objective of a Sardar with a Fiat car. I carried a chunk of files and books on the backseat. I had tea at good restaurant. Within a month I was the known figure in this town. People knew that a Sardar Chartered Accountant with a Fiat car had moved in the town to set up a practice. A good many people from our college days, who had also settled in the town recognized me.
I rented out a decent house and opened my office with lot of fan fare. I invited all who I thought were my potential customers. Some months passed but there were friends but no clients. I however kept the façade of a busy CA with lot of outstation clients. Money was running out and wife was getting a little restless.
Suddenly I realized that this town had no Chit Fund Company. I had some experience in the line. I talked to few friends and told them how money could be multiplied both for the Executive Body, the operators and for the members by collecting funds and investing them in highly profitable business of forward trading called ‘satta’and providing short term loans at high rate of interest. Finally I could convince them and 10 of us formed a Limited company, me as Chairman and others as directors with equal voting rights and share holding. We all chipped in our share of the seed money and started functioning from my office. We adveritsed in news papers and through word of mouth actual payouts, our funds started swelling. We made very good profits in the first year. In the second year debtors starting failing in repayments and we could not meet our obligations to the depositors as promised. Members started withdrawing their money and we started failing in doing so. Since I was the Chairman, I was likely to face criminal cases.
I called the General Meeting which was attended by main members. I told them, they were free to file criminal cases against me but that way they would not get back their money. I asked them to give me one year and I will refund all their money. Till such time they should not ask for refunds. They had no choice but to agree. The Directors also supported the idea as they too had no choice but could also face legal actions. We worked hard with the debtors, even waived interest in many cases and finally were able to refund the principal of each member. We closed the company.
Almost three years were wasted and I was where I had started form. I however gained the confedence of many members and they eventually became my clients. To be frank with you, consultancy is another name of brokerage. I do help them in savings taxes in the legal way but finally the game is how not to pay taxes. The whole system works on the dictum of give and take.
Professionally I am flourishing. I have two kids, both sons aged 10 and 8. I needed an assistant to help me in my work and suddenly an idea struck me why not my wife. She is graduate and qualifies to be a CA. I employed her as an assistant and article clerk and her notional salary goes into the payment of my two sons at the boarding school. Every week we spend week ends with them. In another two years time my wife will also be a CA,”
I was both amused and confused. His story speaks of adventure, unfair business practices, business intergrity and personal and professional advancement. Do means justify the ends?
We are again not in touch for many years now.I am sure he is hail and hearty and plying with his grand children with that never say die attitude. God bless him.
.
Some 15 later, I returned to the town where Deep and I were in College. My niece was getting married. During the course of our talk, she mentioned that Ravi, who claimed to be knowing me as college mate, wanted to meet me. Ir so happened that Ravi owned a popular Saree Shop and they had gone there to buy wedding sarees. They fell short of some money and Ravi suggested that they could pay some other day, as convenient and asked them to give them their name and address for his record. Seeing the common surname, he asked if they were anyway related to me. When they said yes and that I was expected for the wedding, he requested them to ask me to contact them. I could recollect that Ravi was my classmate.
As I had not busy and there was nothing better to do, I went to Ravi’s Saree Shop. We could easily place each other. During the course of our chit chat he informed me that Deep was also in Town, a practicing Chartered Accountant and successful at that. He was Ravi’s tax consultant too. It was something like a bolt from the blue and I requested him to contact him on phone then and there itself.
Ravi dialed Deep’s number and he was on the other side. Ravi briefly informed him about me and handed over the receiver to me. “Arre wahan baitha baitha kya kar raha hai. Jaldi aa aur apane jooton se mere pitai kar”( Oye, what are you doing there. Come immediately and beat me with your shoes). That was Deep for sure. I promised to meet him in the evening at 7.30 and have dinner with him. I said goodbye to Ravi and handed over an Invitation Card to attend the wedding.
I was at his given address exactly at 7.30 in the evening. It was quite a big three storied house. He was at the gate the moment I rang the bell. He had come home early for me, as he said. He asked me what I would like to have for drinks and dinner and I said whatever. We moved to his study. He informed that his wife had gone to meet his kids who were in a boarding school at a nearby hill station and would be returning only after a week or so.
We exchanged the essentials of our lives and family and for rest of time he talked and I listened In his own words;
“After completing my CA I tried to settle in my practice at various places but finally landed in this town. I sold my share of the agricultural land in the villages. I wanted to do differently as my experience so far had been bad, at the best. With my wife I took a room in a pricy Hotel. I moved around the town and observed that most of the cars were Ambassador. I thought who would spot me in an Ambassador. I purchased a second hand Fiat and moved around the town with the single objective of a Sardar with a Fiat car. I carried a chunk of files and books on the backseat. I had tea at good restaurant. Within a month I was the known figure in this town. People knew that a Sardar Chartered Accountant with a Fiat car had moved in the town to set up a practice. A good many people from our college days, who had also settled in the town recognized me.
I rented out a decent house and opened my office with lot of fan fare. I invited all who I thought were my potential customers. Some months passed but there were friends but no clients. I however kept the façade of a busy CA with lot of outstation clients. Money was running out and wife was getting a little restless.
Suddenly I realized that this town had no Chit Fund Company. I had some experience in the line. I talked to few friends and told them how money could be multiplied both for the Executive Body, the operators and for the members by collecting funds and investing them in highly profitable business of forward trading called ‘satta’and providing short term loans at high rate of interest. Finally I could convince them and 10 of us formed a Limited company, me as Chairman and others as directors with equal voting rights and share holding. We all chipped in our share of the seed money and started functioning from my office. We adveritsed in news papers and through word of mouth actual payouts, our funds started swelling. We made very good profits in the first year. In the second year debtors starting failing in repayments and we could not meet our obligations to the depositors as promised. Members started withdrawing their money and we started failing in doing so. Since I was the Chairman, I was likely to face criminal cases.
I called the General Meeting which was attended by main members. I told them, they were free to file criminal cases against me but that way they would not get back their money. I asked them to give me one year and I will refund all their money. Till such time they should not ask for refunds. They had no choice but to agree. The Directors also supported the idea as they too had no choice but could also face legal actions. We worked hard with the debtors, even waived interest in many cases and finally were able to refund the principal of each member. We closed the company.
Almost three years were wasted and I was where I had started form. I however gained the confedence of many members and they eventually became my clients. To be frank with you, consultancy is another name of brokerage. I do help them in savings taxes in the legal way but finally the game is how not to pay taxes. The whole system works on the dictum of give and take.
Professionally I am flourishing. I have two kids, both sons aged 10 and 8. I needed an assistant to help me in my work and suddenly an idea struck me why not my wife. She is graduate and qualifies to be a CA. I employed her as an assistant and article clerk and her notional salary goes into the payment of my two sons at the boarding school. Every week we spend week ends with them. In another two years time my wife will also be a CA,”
I was both amused and confused. His story speaks of adventure, unfair business practices, business intergrity and personal and professional advancement. Do means justify the ends?
We are again not in touch for many years now.I am sure he is hail and hearty and plying with his grand children with that never say die attitude. God bless him.
.
MY FRIEND 'DEEP' PART 1.
MY FRIEND, DEEP(1)
Sardar Mandeep Singh Baweja aka Deep always fascinated me. At times he surprised me too. He was two years junior to me in College. I had finished my graduation was just entered to pursue my PG and he had just enrolled for his graduation. We could possibly have never known each other so well but for the small tiff we had in the college canteen over some seating problem. Fortunately it ended with some heated arguments only before it could turn ugly. In the evening, we came face to face again at a restaurant where I saw him for the first time. I was monthly boarder at this restaurant for the last two years and he presumably had joined today only. It was a popular vegetarian restaurant for the tight budgeted students from out of town.
I had to admire his guts when he came forward and introduced himself as Deep with an extended hand. I had no choice but to hold it as if asking myself to be done with it. But it was not so. He sat on the same table for his meals and during the meals he was telling all about himself which was of little interest to me. All I could grasp was that he was from an agricultural family in some obscure village of the adjoining district and that he was the only of the 6 siblings likely to graduate and become a professional one day. Agriculture did not interest him and he wanted to do something different. .
Every day in the morning he would wish me in the college and before I knew it we were friends. He was staying in a rented accommodation. I was also staying in a rented accommodation but shared it with a friend. He used to invite me to his room. We would sometimes order non-vegetarian food and beer. On such occasions he would bring one cigarette for me to smoke. I did smoke once in a while but never expected that a Sikh will allow me to smoke before him, least to say of buying a cigarette for me. He said he liked the smell of cigarette but as his religion did not permit him he would rather abstain.
Coming from an agricultural family, he would get his expenses depending on the funds at home not like monthly as I was getting from my Government employee father. So on occasion he was flush with money but mostly broke because most of the money he got went in paying his overdue college fees with penalty, Hotel, Milkman, Washer man in that priority. A good part of the balance was spent on non- veg food and beers and movies. He spent like a king as long as he had money in his pocket least bothered for tomorrow. At times he would take a detour to avoid his lenders. On the contrary I always had some cash with me to see me through till the next money order . He would not hesitate to demand 'arre dash rupaye Dena’ (give me ten rupees). He had no intention of returning and I too had no reason to ask considering the way he spent on me when he had. I would ask him to be judicious in spending but all in vain.
He was a great extrovert and made friends easily. His friendship with Harpreet and Jagjeet was also the result of his outgoing nature. These two young Sardars belonged to Government Contractor families and were looking after their recently acquired civil contract in the town. They also were occasional visitors to our restaurant where the friendship developed. They obviously came from well to do families or were having lucrative margins in business. Whatever, they spent lavishly and sometimes on us too offering fresh fruit juice from a close by stall which they frequented almost daily and had a running account there. Deep became quite close to them. Time passed and our friends grew stronger.
Final exams were approaching. We both decided to concentrate on exams and would meet only at the restaurant for meals. One day he informed that the contractors duo had suddenly vanished and had not paid the juice stall owner. It was heard that authorities had come to know about their selling cement allotted to them at controlled rates, in the black market at a premium. Their contract was cancelled. . It happened in January and since we were too concerned about our exams, we could not follow it up. Years later , while crossing a Cantonment Area, I saw one of them in Military Uniform as new recruit.
One evening, in mid- February, I saw Deep having heated arguments with Restaurant owner. On enquiry it was revealed that his three brothers, on visit to town, had come to the restaurant for meals but were refused credit. Though the owner had seen them in the past but he refused to recognize them. This infuriated Deep and we left without having our meals. We never visited that restaurant again, not even for paying our dues.
Now we faced another problem. Boys being boys, hotels generally stopped giving credit from January onwards to students as they feared they may leave without settling dues immediately after exams were over in March. All asked for advance payment. In my case the last money order for the year had already come and so was the case with Deep. I had some money available but he had almost nil. We negotiated with a restaurant and paid advance for the remaining part of Feb. The problem was how to arrange for March.
Deep suggested that we go to his village and he would ask his parents for money on some pretext and I would endorse his plea. I knew it was wrong but agreed as there was choice either. We went to his village, only two hours bus ride, stayed there for the night and left in the morning. His parents treated me as a family member and I had the taste of Sikh Hospitality. He had managed to get money from his parents saying he needed the same for paying final exams- Fee. We returned as victors.
Exams over, he left for his home and I for mine, hoping to meet after the results were out. We met in June. Both had passed. He had decided to pursue Chartered Accountant course and I to look for a job and both landed in Delhi. There I introduced him to my elder brother. I landed in job with a Private Sector Company and after initial training of six months was posted in Madras (Now Chennai) to develop dealer network in Southern States.
We kept in touch. Whenever I had the occasion to visit Delhi we would meet and enjoy. He was his usual self. Same Deep, Living on credit till the next installment of funds reached from village. Became friendly with my brother and ask him for small change without any hesitation. Spending like king when pocket is full, avoiding creditors and seeking money from friends when in need.
Life is demanding. We kept in touch but eventually we lost to the demands of our respective lives. My brother confirmed that he completed his CA and left for some unknown destination and was not touch anymore.
Inquisitive? For further updates see ‘MY FRIEND, DEEP (2).
Sardar Mandeep Singh Baweja aka Deep always fascinated me. At times he surprised me too. He was two years junior to me in College. I had finished my graduation was just entered to pursue my PG and he had just enrolled for his graduation. We could possibly have never known each other so well but for the small tiff we had in the college canteen over some seating problem. Fortunately it ended with some heated arguments only before it could turn ugly. In the evening, we came face to face again at a restaurant where I saw him for the first time. I was monthly boarder at this restaurant for the last two years and he presumably had joined today only. It was a popular vegetarian restaurant for the tight budgeted students from out of town.
I had to admire his guts when he came forward and introduced himself as Deep with an extended hand. I had no choice but to hold it as if asking myself to be done with it. But it was not so. He sat on the same table for his meals and during the meals he was telling all about himself which was of little interest to me. All I could grasp was that he was from an agricultural family in some obscure village of the adjoining district and that he was the only of the 6 siblings likely to graduate and become a professional one day. Agriculture did not interest him and he wanted to do something different. .
Every day in the morning he would wish me in the college and before I knew it we were friends. He was staying in a rented accommodation. I was also staying in a rented accommodation but shared it with a friend. He used to invite me to his room. We would sometimes order non-vegetarian food and beer. On such occasions he would bring one cigarette for me to smoke. I did smoke once in a while but never expected that a Sikh will allow me to smoke before him, least to say of buying a cigarette for me. He said he liked the smell of cigarette but as his religion did not permit him he would rather abstain.
Coming from an agricultural family, he would get his expenses depending on the funds at home not like monthly as I was getting from my Government employee father. So on occasion he was flush with money but mostly broke because most of the money he got went in paying his overdue college fees with penalty, Hotel, Milkman, Washer man in that priority. A good part of the balance was spent on non- veg food and beers and movies. He spent like a king as long as he had money in his pocket least bothered for tomorrow. At times he would take a detour to avoid his lenders. On the contrary I always had some cash with me to see me through till the next money order . He would not hesitate to demand 'arre dash rupaye Dena’ (give me ten rupees). He had no intention of returning and I too had no reason to ask considering the way he spent on me when he had. I would ask him to be judicious in spending but all in vain.
He was a great extrovert and made friends easily. His friendship with Harpreet and Jagjeet was also the result of his outgoing nature. These two young Sardars belonged to Government Contractor families and were looking after their recently acquired civil contract in the town. They also were occasional visitors to our restaurant where the friendship developed. They obviously came from well to do families or were having lucrative margins in business. Whatever, they spent lavishly and sometimes on us too offering fresh fruit juice from a close by stall which they frequented almost daily and had a running account there. Deep became quite close to them. Time passed and our friends grew stronger.
Final exams were approaching. We both decided to concentrate on exams and would meet only at the restaurant for meals. One day he informed that the contractors duo had suddenly vanished and had not paid the juice stall owner. It was heard that authorities had come to know about their selling cement allotted to them at controlled rates, in the black market at a premium. Their contract was cancelled. . It happened in January and since we were too concerned about our exams, we could not follow it up. Years later , while crossing a Cantonment Area, I saw one of them in Military Uniform as new recruit.
One evening, in mid- February, I saw Deep having heated arguments with Restaurant owner. On enquiry it was revealed that his three brothers, on visit to town, had come to the restaurant for meals but were refused credit. Though the owner had seen them in the past but he refused to recognize them. This infuriated Deep and we left without having our meals. We never visited that restaurant again, not even for paying our dues.
Now we faced another problem. Boys being boys, hotels generally stopped giving credit from January onwards to students as they feared they may leave without settling dues immediately after exams were over in March. All asked for advance payment. In my case the last money order for the year had already come and so was the case with Deep. I had some money available but he had almost nil. We negotiated with a restaurant and paid advance for the remaining part of Feb. The problem was how to arrange for March.
Deep suggested that we go to his village and he would ask his parents for money on some pretext and I would endorse his plea. I knew it was wrong but agreed as there was choice either. We went to his village, only two hours bus ride, stayed there for the night and left in the morning. His parents treated me as a family member and I had the taste of Sikh Hospitality. He had managed to get money from his parents saying he needed the same for paying final exams- Fee. We returned as victors.
Exams over, he left for his home and I for mine, hoping to meet after the results were out. We met in June. Both had passed. He had decided to pursue Chartered Accountant course and I to look for a job and both landed in Delhi. There I introduced him to my elder brother. I landed in job with a Private Sector Company and after initial training of six months was posted in Madras (Now Chennai) to develop dealer network in Southern States.
We kept in touch. Whenever I had the occasion to visit Delhi we would meet and enjoy. He was his usual self. Same Deep, Living on credit till the next installment of funds reached from village. Became friendly with my brother and ask him for small change without any hesitation. Spending like king when pocket is full, avoiding creditors and seeking money from friends when in need.
Life is demanding. We kept in touch but eventually we lost to the demands of our respective lives. My brother confirmed that he completed his CA and left for some unknown destination and was not touch anymore.
Inquisitive? For further updates see ‘MY FRIEND, DEEP (2).
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